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The Periodic Midlife/Longlife Update E-newsletter June 2006
The Periodic Midlife/Longlife Update E-newsletter
is devoted to sharing information and enhancing
excellence in ongoing faith and holistic formation for maturing adults from
midlife through end of life.
Bill Prather, Founder and Director
of Partners In Pastoral Care
seeks to provide members with
an ongoing flow of practical information that leaders/models can use directly
with adults of all ages. Training is also offered through the educational arm
of Partners in Pastoral Care.
All opinions expressed herein are those of the
author. Permission is granted to reproduce this issue in whole or in part as
long as its source is identified.
May
is Older Americans Month. The theme for this year’s Older
Americans Month is “Choices For Independence.” The Administration on Aging has
produced informational materials to help agencies and individuals promote key
issues for older adults and their families during May, as well as information
about nutrition and health in the older population. For more information,
visit: www.aoa.gov/press/oam/May_2006/Materials_Downloads.asp
In This Issue:
1.Are Any of Your Sheep Depressed?
2.Prescription for Older Adults’
Nutrition(Out-of-the-Box Idea)
3.Finding
Your Spiritual Luster: An Exercise
4.A
Thought Concerning Mothers
1.How common is it for
you, through your daily ministry, not to meet one person who is not struggling with depression? For me, meeting dear ones who are burdened with
this awful malady is a common event.
Around 5% of the elder population is said to suffer from major depression
at any one time. However, this number jumps to 50% for those elders who are
physically sick, and as much as 70% for those living in skilled care
facilities.
Researcher
Delores Gallagher-Thompson Ph.D. of the
University
of
Missouri
devised a behavioral intervention strategy for depression in elders. The basic
10- to 20-week program taught patients practical copings skills such as:
1) Cognitive
reframing (thinking of your distress in other terms)
2) Assertiveness
(giving oneself permission to express your preferences)
2.I am constantly
on the receiving end of puzzled looks and slightly audible gasps when I share
in a conference workshop with leaders/pastors of the Midlife/Longlife
generations.The challenges and
questions come during a break or following the presentation; I suppose folks
want to spare me embarrassment with my answers. Most want to know why I would
suggest “such ideas” for ministry to these aged generations.One of my favorite ideas is to invite the
Midlife/Longlife community in a particular area, town, or city to a fabulous free but highly nutritious meal.
Free, because these generations love “free.” Longlifers, because
they are the generation that need to save every penny, so they can give
something to their kids when they die. Midlifers were raised by parents who
gave them everything. They have that sense of entitlement of getting it free.
Nutritious, because research on the health benefits of
specific types of foods has found more and more connection between nutrition
and health in later life. Recommendations from nutrition science have evolved
from general admonitions to eat healthful foods to suggestions on specific
diets to prevent chronic diseases or achieve health maintenance goals. For
example, diets rich in fruits and vegetables have been shown to help reduce
high blood pressure and the risk for cardiovascular disease, diabetes and some
cancers.
Okay, free and nutritious, but where’s
the ministry in it? My answer is:Are
there Midlifers/Longlifers that do not eat properly because they are single,
low income, undisciplined in eating habits, lonely, depressed, or lack
knowledge of food preparation? I see ministry where folks can eat a delicious
meal while having wonderful fellowship with others of like characteristics, and
gathering information and knowledge through a demonstration and presentation by
a professional dietician who specializes in gerontology nutritional issues. You
will not believe the interaction, questions and interest that will be
developed, not only about the subject but about your group and/or church. You
might want to solicit sponsorship from various businesses, organizations and
medical groups, allowing them to have a display booth and name publication on a
program.Out-of-the-box possibilities are
endless for ministry.
New federal dietary guidelines for Americans outlined on the MyPyramid.gov
website reflect the statements I have made concerning the nutrition findings.
Let me say here that many healthcare
providers are at a loss when it comes to finding a supportive, effective way to
communicate with aging adults about the recommended daily servings of
macronutrients—proteins, carbohydrates and fats. I’m suggesting that as a
shepherd of God’s older flock, we initiate ministry that will lead people to a
physical, emotional and spiritual life that is filled with vitality.
It is unbelievably simple for anyone to
use this site developed by the
AmericanAcademy
of Family
Physicians. Go there if you have interest ineasy-to-use visual tools for preparing plans to meet individual older
adults' nutritional needs.
3.Let me give you and your
Midlife/Longlife community a taste of one of our fascinating workshop subjects
that is seldom approached. That is the notion
of spiritual luster that was presented to me a couple of years ago by Richard
P. Johnson, Ph.D., PCSG. We describe spiritual luster as the energy that
activates aging adults (50+) to live life to the fullest by extending their
inner essence into the mainstream of life with greater gusto and spiritual
stamina.Spiritual luster gives us a
window into the sources of human happiness, health, and wholesomeness over the
entire adult span. The concept helps us delve into the tasks of senior adult
living, and sees spiritual development as a process of building up inner
resources and attitudes to enjoy and/or transcend all life experiences.
Further, we say that spiritual luster rests on three legs of a stool: a)
luminosity; b) beauty; and 3) distinctiveness.
You are welcome to use this exercise
with your Midlife/Longlife group or, better yet, split your groups. It is
usually more effective in two sessions for Longlifers (65+), and Midlifers
(50+) can benefit easily with a 1 ½ hour session.
Spiritual Luster
Introduction: While luminosity, beauty, and distinctiveness hold up the stool of spiritual
luster, there are many components that sit on the stool.These components are the building blocks of
luminosity, beauty, and distinctiveness, all of which configure themselves
differently in each of us to create our own unique and personal spiritual
luster.These components are the special
ways that senior adults express their spiritual luster; together they make up a
person's unique spiritual luster style. From among over 50 components of
spiritual luster, research uncovered ten components that seem, for most
seniors, the most important ways they define their unique spiritual luster style.
In a moment you are going to have fun taking a
little questionnaire that measures the top ten components of spiritual luster
for aging adults. Since there are no right or wrong answers, only truthful
ones, we will really enjoy discussing with one another just how each of our
parts helps to describe the fullness of how we express our spiritual luster.
Here is a list and short definition of the top ten components parts of
spiritual luster in order:
1. Prayerful:
The degree to which you believe you sit with the Lord and ponder the sacred.
2. Faith-Driven:
The degree to which you believe your life derivesmeaning from your belief system.
3. Real: The
degree to which you are authentically true before self and others.
4. Radiator of
Christ's Peace:The degree to which
you know and reflect the serenity of deep peace.
5. Committed:
The degree to which you are focused on a goal and are able to continue toward
it.
6. Balanced: The
degree to which the whole of your life is in harmony.
7. Affirming of Self:
The degree to which you value and empower yourself.
8. A Listener:The degree to which you are sensitive to and
respond to the needs of others.
9. Respectful:The degree to which you truly allow others to
be themselves.
10. Optimistic:The degree to which you witness and spread
joy.
FINDING YOUR SPIRITUAL LUSTER QUESTIONNAIRE:
Read along with your audience through
the 10-point scale and ask if anyone has any questions.
Webster defines luster as: a) glow or luminosity of
reflected light, especially from within; b) inner beauty; and c)
brilliance and/or distinction. Spiritual luster is that quality that
allows persons of faith to express their inner spiritual uniqueness out into
the world, that unique inner quality that reflects the grace of God outward.
This Spiritual Luster Questionnaire is designed as a
brief device that helps you define that particular configuration of spiritual
luster that is unique to you. No one has spiritual luster exactly like you do!
Once your spiritual luster is uncovered, you can then take the steps necessary
to let your "light shine" brightly. You're happiest when you express
your spiritual luster fully.
DIRECTIONS:For each statement, respond with the number from 1 to 10 which best
describes how you genuinely feel and think right now about the idea in the
statement. Use this 10-point scale.
1. Not at all 6.
To an above average degree
2. Minimally, if at all7.
To a moderate degree
3. Only slightly8.
To a significant degree
4. To a minor degree9.
To a substantial degree
5. To an average degree 10. To the highest degree
PLACE
YOUR RESPONSE IN THE BLANK SPACE PROVIDED NEXT TO EACH ITEM.
____1. I communicate with God regularly and
genuinely.
____2. I listen to and wait on the spiritual
within me.
____3. I know without question that God is
always there for me.
____4. I know that my faith sustains me every
moment.
____5. I genuinely show others the person who
I really am.
____6. I am transparently myself.
____7. I illuminate my world with God's peace.
____8. I reflect the silent peace of heaven
that is within me.
____9. I remain committed even in the face of
adversity.
____10. I surmount odds with persistence.
____11. I create equilibrium among all the
arenas of my life.
____12. I bring my life into true balance.
____13. I value myself highly.
____14. I recognize that I am a "pearl of
great price."
____15. I clearly hear the deep concerns of
others.
____16. I lend a sensitive ear to the issues
of others.
____17. I am genuinely thoughtful of the
unique and individual requirements of others.
____18. I give honor and reverence to the
least among us.
____19. I am enthusiastic in my approach to
life in general.
____20. I influence events and others for good
wherever I go.
FINDING
YOUR SPIRITUAL LUSTER
SCORING:Each
pair of items, i.e., 1 & 2, 3 & 4, 5 & 6, etc., correlate to a
separate one of the 10 component factors which constitute "Spiritual
Luster."Simply add the combined
total of these two items and divide by 2 to create a score in each one.
These three constitute your unique spiritual
luster strengths.
INSIGHT ACTIVITY:Write a short statement on how these three help you to:
a)
Demonstrate you luminosity
b) Portray your beauty
c)
Express your uniqueness.
4.I am thinking
that maybe the following applies to all women, not just mothers. You might
suggest that a Christian “red hat” club be started among your Midlife/Longlife
ladies.
Age 3: She
looks at herself and sees a Queen.
Age 8: She looks at herself and sees
Cinderella.
Age 15:She looks at herself and sees an
Ugly Sister (“Mom, I can't go to school looking like this!”).
Age 20: She looks at herself and sees
"too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly"—but
decides she's going out anyway.
Age 30: She looks at herself and sees
"too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly"— but
decides she doesn't have time to fix it, so she's going out anyway.
Age 40: She looks at herself and
sees "clean" and goes out anyway.
Age 50: She looks at herself and
sees "I am" and goes wherever she wants to go.
Age 60: She looks at herself and reminds
herself of all the people who can't even see themselves in the mirror anymore.
Goes out and conquers the world.
Age 70: She looks at herself and sees
wisdom, laughter and ability. Goes out and enjoys life.
Age 80: Doesn't bother to look. Just
puts on a purple hat and goes out to have fun.
The purpose of the maturation process is not simply to continue or elongate what was about life, but a process that creates something altogether new in this very moment, while at the same time points to what’s to come.
I present this material at a deeper level with strong scriptural and study resources to various faith groups, anywhere, anytime. Contact Partners In Pastoral Care office if you have further interest. This periodic e-newsletter is sent free of charge to pastors, leaders and interested individuals. If you have friends that would like to receive this newsletter, please have them e-mail Shepardscare@aol.com and we will add them to our list. If you no longer wish to receive this newsletter, please e-mail Shepardscare@aol.com and put the word "unsubscribe" in the subject line.
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